This is ME

Growing up, I went to church pretty much every Sunday. I always looked forward to Sunday’s. My dad and I wouldn’t wake up early, grab bagels, come home and get ready, head to church, connect with God, then spend the rest of the day together as a family.

For Middle School I went to a Lutheran school. For part of High School I went to a Catholic school.

Religion has always been a big part of my life.

When I became a mother, I felt it was important for my children to know God and the connection I shared with Him. My babies were baptized when they were young. We go to church almost every Sunday. We pray over every meal, every night before bed, and whenever we feel we should. God and Jesus are welcomed in our house.

I know some feel baptizing children young is forcing them into believing something before they have a choice to. I feel baptizing children young protects them. Then as they get older they can choose what they want to believe in. Some feel going to church every Sunday is forced upon children into a “brainwashing cult”. I feel going to church is a way to get closer to God and be surrounded by people who share that same love for Him. But. If my child told me they don’t want to go, it is never forced on them.

I know people can be close-minded and one-sided when it comes to religion. But I need to say this and hope those who feel so negatively about church and God can see a different side, and maybe, just maybe, be more open to stop with the attacks and negativity and respect our love and beliefs.

In High School, I went thru a lot of struggles. More than one should. Every time I went downhill, I felt God lift me up. I have personally experienced His greatness and His power. That’s why I believe. Not because I was “forced” to by my parents, or church, or school. He has always been there, thru good and bad. I know His love. And I will pray everyone feels His love, including my children.

Saturday nights, my girls go to bed, “Mommy! Do we have church tomorrow?”, I respond “yep!”, they run off, “Hurry! Let’s get to bed so we can go to church.” You would think it’s Christmas Eve or something by how they’re so excited. Never once have I forced them, they make their own choices. And trust me, there’s plenty of Sundays I don’t want to go, but stay in my PJs, and they beg to go. Never forced…

With that being said, my daughter who’s wiser than her years at 6 1/2, it’s the coolest thing talking to her about God. When she was 2, we had an “evil experience”, if you will. She would tell us about this bad man in her room everyday. We played it off as a child with nightmares, sat with her and prayed until she felt safer, then back to bed. One day, we felt it. I can’t describe the feeling… If you ask my daughter about that experience, she will tell you how God protected her. She will tell you when she felt scared she prayed. She will tell you this bad man haunted her and wanted her to do bad things, but she would tell him that he doesn’t scare her, God is with her, and he will protect her from evil. And he has since left us alone. That day changed her and her belief in God. And she has since begged to go to church to learn more.

Church is about learning about God and Jesus. My children learn about the love they have for us and how we are to love others the same. My children learn about helping others thru good deeds, to never judge others, and that in everything, God is always there. No brainwashing. No cult. No talk about “not following the imaginary man will end you in hell.” Just love, respect others, be kind to all, and to never judge.

Why wouldn’t we want our children to spread love? Why wouldn’t we want them to know they should never judge someone for being different? Why wouldn’t we want them to know they can make the world a bit brighter with a caring heart?

That’s what we as parents are supposed to teach our children, whether it is thru church or at home…

But we can’t the moment we are negative and judging others because they are unaware or close-minded to Christians.

I’m not judging those who don’t believe and choose not to! That’s totally fine and your right to believe how you want. What I want, what I pray for, what I beg… we understand that we may never see eye to eye on every situation, and that’s okay! But let’s respect one another. Let’s stop posting online or messaging one another to make a mockery and making fun of my beliefs. Let’s stop calling me names for living the way we live with God. Let’s stop with the negativity and rudeness.

I will never judge you or make fun of you or call you names for believing differently than me. I will pray that one day you can feel the amazing love God has. I will pray that you can open your heart up to Him. I will always love you, regardless of our differences.

Let’s stop the hate and spread the love.

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Always Leave a Little Sparkle Everywhere You Go

See this girl? She’s my first born. The biggest goofball, has a heart of gold, super smart, and extremely talented at so many things.

We’ve just learned that she’s being bullied at school.

A group of girls at recess won’t let her play anywhere without taunting her and calling her names.

What makes me sadder than the fact she’s being bullied is that she didn’t tell us. She told a friend of hers who told us about it (thank God for her friend, right?!). When we finally got her to open up about it, she tells us that kids say she’s weird and and what all they’ve been doing to her.

As a child who was bullied most of my school years (I was always the heavier kid…). I dealt with mean girls (and boys, especially come middle school), evil pranks, name calling, threats, and even physical fights. I remember that feeling of isolation and sadness. I definitely don’t want my children to feel that…

So. As a parent, my first instinct is to protect my child. I want to find these girls and put them in their place… but I obviously know I can’t. I’d like to go to her every recess and watch her making sure no one messes with her… again I know I can’t. My children need to learn to fight their own battles, if you will.

What we tell our children about bullies and how to react make the world of difference. Most people who feel the need to bully are in pain in some way. They are taught to view violence and aggression in a positive way. They’re also believe negative attention is the only way to get attention. They may need to feel they control all this power because they have no power at home. They often don’t have the proper influence to teach them these ways are wrong.

So what should I tell my daughter about these bullies?

The truth.

I told her how these bullies, deep down, are hurting and are sad. These bullies may not be getting enough love at home. I told her how these bullies weren’t taught how to be a good friend. I told her she needs to stand up for herself and anyone else that she sees being bullied. To always do what’s right, no matter how hard that can be. Most importantly, to be loving and kind, as God teaches us to be.

I hope she can understand the truth about bullies. I hope she knows it isn’t her fault or who she isn’t what truly bothers them. They act that way to her because they see the good in her and that makes them sad for not having what she has. I pray she stands up for herself and can show the bullies that she feels sorry for them having to result to such bad behavior. Be brave, be kind, be loving, and pray for them. Always leave a little sparkle everywhere you go. I know my daughter is only one child in a world full of millions who get bullied, but let’s help our children together to break this cycle and end bullying.

One Step at a Time

If you read my last blog post, I talked about how I needed to start taking care of myself. I've put myself on the back burner cause I have three babies, a husband, five animals, and a to do list longer than I want to talk about… But. I'm learning I cannot take care of everyone and everything else if I don't stop and put myself first.

So this morning I woke up and did yoga. For the first time in a year and a half. Yoga used to be my go to, something I did religiously every day, and I stopped for whatever reason.

Man… It hurt (physically and mentally) struggling into easy poses. Downward dog, for instance… was a sad struggle. I fought thru the pain and towards the end became more tolerable. I have a long way to go to get myself back anywhere close to where I was before, but it's a journey I need to take and can't wait to watch me progress.

I will be making this a daily part of my routine again. And I can't wait to share my progress thru it!

Where are all my yogis? What's your favorite pose??

#projectME Part 2

It's time that I need to get a little selfish…..

The last six years or so of my life have been, needless to say, a whirlwind. I haven't stopped to take much of a breath or really appreciate everything I have in my life. I've devoted myself to being the best wife, mother, daughter, friend, sister…. but somehow along the way, I've lost myself.

It is really hard for me to say that. Really hard to admit that I have so many times of anxiety, frustration, irrational thoughts, bursts of agitation, and sometimes, battle depression. I do like to think of myself as a generally happy person, always looking at the best of every situation, but deep down, inside, I feel lost.

I have a passion for helping people and making people happy. But, I've come to the realization, I cannot help others unless I help myself first.

Why do I feel lost? Well, that's easy. Every minute of every day is about my husband and children. My family, my friends, my animals. The only ME time I get, if I'm lucky, is in the shower or the occasional run to the store alone. I pour my heart and soul into everything for everyone else, it gets exhausting when I can't take even a millisecond on myself.

Hey! I'm not trying to complain at all!

My life, my family, we are totally blessed! I thank the Lord every day for everything we've been blessed with! But, I haven't really taken good care of me (probably why I threw my back out). I don't have a relationship with God like I should, I don't workout near as much as I'd like to, don't eat great most of the time, I drink (maybe a bit more than I should at times), and, on top of all that…. I haven't given MYSELF a break or any self focus. Anyone who knows me, knows I am ALWAYS going and ALWAYS putting myself last.

So here we go. Calling this #projectME. I have so much here to be thankful for, so much to enjoy! I need to be the best possible version of myself! I need to be healthy physically, mentally, and spiritually! It's not just for me, but for everyone in my life.

So, how am I going to achieve this?

1. I will be doing a complete 180 on my diet. I know what I should and shouldn't be doing. I also know that diet affects my mood. So, I need to evaluate what I'm doing, what I need to change, and implement that change!

2. I will be devoting time every morning to myself for personal development.

3. I will start up my yoga challenges again, and challenge myself more in my yoga practice.

4. I will learn more about mediation and mediating every day along with my personal development and yoga practice every morning.

5. I will not allow myself to get stressed out over the small stuff. That being said, I will also make peace with the "troubles" I hold onto and release that stress it causes me to hold.

6. I will learn to do what I preach to my children every day, to love myself.

7. I will go to church more and become more active in the church like I used to be.

8. I will create an obtainable workout goal and stick to it.

9. I will start to take better care of myself, inside and out. My teeth, regular doctor check ups, finally get that over due eye exam, and take better care of my hair and skin.

10. I will put more energy into my projects and hobbies that make me who I am.

11. Finally, last but certainly not least, I will devote myself to be the best wife and mother I can possibly be. Focusing on my family and enjoying more of the many blessings I have.

I do know that #projectME will make me happier, healthier, and a more stable person. Soul searching is so healthy and much needed. That's the point of this. I know I deserve it as well as everyone that's around me. I'm so blessed to have this life I have, and the ability to unplug and to focus on myself.

So, here I am go! Time to find myself again and become the best version of myself as possible! WISH ME LUCK!

#projectme Part 1

Yesterday, the day before my 29th birthday, while I was doing housework (mopping 😐), I threw my back. I bent to clean under the birds cage and felt POP! Sharp shooting pain in my back, up thru my neck, out into my hips, numbness in my legs, and the fear… WHAT HAPPENED?!

I don’t know about you, but I’m not one to be all bummed for turning another year older. I actually get excited. But this year, throwing my back out, I feel damn old.

While soaking my aching back (and pride) in the tub, it hit me. My body was telling me for months something was wrong. Severe constant back pain. I rolled it off saying “its the way I’m sleeping” or “its just ‘nursing back’ pain”. I’m a mother and a wife. I always put my family before myself, by far my biggest downfall. I tell myself that I have no time to take care of myself, these four other people in my life need me more.

I had my youngest, Giovanni, who I am still nursing, crawling on me as I laid lifeless on the floor, crying cause he was hungry. I managed to get myself onto all fours and nurse him. Yes, it was just how you envision… like a cow being milked. It was the worst pain I’ve ever experienced, and I gave birth to THREE kids!

I cried because my husband had to assist me to the bathroom and in getting dressed. I wasn’t myself in the least. Having to depend on others to help me is not like me. I’m usually the one doing everything for others, never asking for help. I felt completely embarrassed and useless.

And knowing this could have been prevented if I would have stopped and listened to my body… even more humiliating.

I have lost myself in this crazy beautiful whirlwind of a life. I have stopped taking caring about myself cause I’m concerned with caring for others. I realize after yesterday, as much as I love to care for others, I cannot continue to do it if I don’t stop and make myself a priority.

So here we go. ProjectME. Project Ang2.0. It’s time to become a better version of myself.

Stay tuned!

Project Revitalize 

As we are nearing the end of April, I’m starting my Spring Cleaning. I’m committed myself to eliminate what isn’t necessary. Each room, closet, cabinet, nook and cranny will be throughly gone thru, cleaned, and organized. I’m on a mission!

While going thru the books in the kids desk, I found it; what I’ve been ignoring. 

My New Years Resolutions. 

I always write them down as that seems to help me actually achieve them. This year, writing them down just turned it into a beautiful coloring page for my daughters. 

It’s almost May, and I haven’t done almost any of my resolutions. I put the paper to the side, kept doing what I’m doing, then a thought came to me. Why do I always put so much pressure on myself at the New Year to accomplish things I can do anytime? Obviously my mind wasn’t ready to even think about doing anything let alone actually do it. But I’m in a better place now than I was in January with my PPDA. Let’s re-evaluate these resolutions and see what I can really do!

When I set my mind to a goal, there’s always a word that sticks with me. Something that, in a sense, helps set the starting  point and keeps motivating me. This word came to me like a cat when it hears their treat bag. Fast and obvious. 

REVITALIZE. 

That’s my word. Here’s how I’m going to revitalize myself:

Revitalize physically through healthier eating. 2016 was a year of incredible joy being pregnant with Giovanni and then giving birth to him in October. But as it  turns out, growing this beautiful life and providing all he needs through nursing makes a person ravenous. And when you’re ravenous all the time, it’s all too easy to develop poor eating habits. By now (he’s almost 7 months), I am eating whatever my body craved and, in all honesty, whatever was the quickest and cheapest. I’ve been feeling completely lethargic, grumpy, and not myself. So, I’m taking steps toward healthier eating through portion control and clean eating. I’ve always felt my best when I ate clean, and it’s truly no harder than loading three kids into the mini van and taking them to Burger King. 



Revitalize through exercise. My body has not “bounced back” as quickly (or easily) as I had hoped it would after having Giovanni. It doesn’t help that I haven’t been eating the healthiest, nor following a healthy lifestyle in the least. I’ve been avoiding scales and jeans for far too long. Its time to do something about it. And in addition to revitalizing my body with healthy, clean foods, I know I need to revitalize my body with regular exercise. I will be getting back into my daily yoga practice, as well as restart Beachbody’s PiYo. Time to start getting my energy back and maybe loose a few LBs in the process. 



Mental revitalization through more books, less screen-time. With all the exhaustion that came with being mom of three, hauling my oldest to and from school, and all of my kids activities, I’d often resort to mindless browsing on my phone (Pinterest addict 🙋🏻) or a Fixer Upper binge simply because it was all I felt I could handle mentally. But rather than veg out during my down time, I want to get back into my love for reading. I’m committing myself to spending less time looking at screens and more time stimulating my mind with good literature. Starting with a great personal development, Hands Free Mama. (Psst! Any “must-reads,” I should know about? Comment below!)


Revitalize my marriage. I will say, I have an amazing marriage. My husband and I are the best of friends and best of team mates. Our problem is we don’t have much alone time. Between three busy children and a crazy work schedule, we’re lucky to get a half hour alone. I vow to make our time alone, no matter how little, more special. You can never be too close to your spouse, right?! 

Revitalize my “projects”. I’m going to call them projects. My many “businesses” per day. Most have been neglected for far too long and something in me is pushing to get them revitalized! I will pour more energy into them and make them flourish! Also, I have a new adventure I’m currently working on I cannot wait to share! My many “projects” aren’t necessarily to make tons of income (would be nice, of course), but it’s something that’s mine. Majority of the time I’m all mother, wife, daughter, and friend. Come the end of the day, there’s nothing that’s mine. Except these “projects”… I will be bringing them back to life and sharing on my blog page, so stay tuned!

Last, but not least…

Revitalize the homefront. Throughout the years, many moves, and three kids later, we’ve collected more “stuff” than should be legally allowed. We have a problem. Being that it’s Spring Cleaning time, I’m going room by room, inch by inch, going thru everything. If something hasn’t been touched in years, sell or donate. If it’s broken, trash. No more excuses as to why we need to keep so much “stuff”. Minimalist lifestyle. That’s the goal. Less “stuff” to maintain and clean, more time to live and enjoy life with our babies. 

My New Years Resolutions will be no more.. they are my goals. Period. I will accomplish them. I will revitalize my life. My struggle is I am a perfectionist, but I’m also a procrastinator. So I push things off until I know I can do it perfectly. I have to teach myself it will only get “perfect” if I try and try harder, not by sitting back and waiting. 

Today’s the day. Today change will happen. Praying for God to be by my side and to help me stay strong. Praying I have the support at home to revitalize our lives. I feel it in my bones something amazing is about to happen, and if I sit here and wait, it will just pass by!

Why I do spirit days at school…


Yesterday marked 100 days of school for my oldest daughter. 100 days in Kindergarten! So, the kids got the chance to dress up like they’re 100 years old. We got her all dressed up and she was totally loving it!


My daughter yesterday morning for her 100th day of school. Looking like a little old Italian lady!

I was rather disappointed to see less than half of the Kindergarteners were dressed up. Then, I saw a little boy bawling his eyes out because his mom didn’t dress him up, in which she tells him “We don’t do these stupid things.”  

Wow. 

Now, I’m not one to force my children to do things they don’t want. When we were told they could dress up, I explained it to her and told her what we could do. She helped me pick out her outfit, I did her hair, and she wanted to wear her favorite glasses from her science kit. It was a fun thing to do together. Most importantly, she wanted to dress up! If she told me she didn’t want to, I wouldn’t force her to. Spirit days are meant to be fun!

But to tell your child having school spirit is “stupid” made me very upset. Is it because you don’t want to take the time to dress your child up? Is it because you truly don’t care? 

First, I must say this. As parents, the most important people in our children lives, we are their biggest role models. We are to model the behavior we want to see from them. Something like encouraging positive spirit for school,  helps build a positive school atmosphere, which leads to a happier more productive learning environment. We want our children to succeed and love school, so when they get the opportunity to do something to show off their spirit and have fun, encourage them to participate! 

After yesterday and seeing the little boy crying about not participating in the 100th day celebration, mostly after hearing what his mother had said, I began reading. I read numerous studies, all positive reasons to encourage spirit in school. 

  1. It can improve a students committment to their education, making them better academically. 
  2. It creates a positive learning environment, which can make going to school even more exciting!
  3. It can make them more engaged in social and civic matters. 
  4. It can make students greater achievers. 
  5. It makes a student more creative and unique. 
  6. Overall, can make them happier in general. 

When our children become adults and have grown up participating in school spirit, it can reflect in their work ethic. I have seen it growing up. Students who dressed up for spirit week and cheered on their schools team, are today the employees that go above and beyond, that take an extra assignment to help the team, who are big team players. The ones who never showed school spirit go to work to do the bare minimum and never exceed expectations. 

I know it seems extreme to compare school spirit to work ethic, but it’s one in the same. In school, you’re not making a pay check but making grades. And working hard and striving to be the best gets you the best grades. In the work force, your not making grades per say but a paycheck. You work hard to fulfill your commitment to your company and go above any beyond to help your team. It’s the same! 

We need to encourage our children at a young age to be involved in activities, inside and outside of school! We need to encourage our children to be the best versions of themselves, even if it’s shown thru wearing a crazy hair style!  Encourage to love learning and that going to school isn’t something to dread but something to be excited for! School spirit is the foundation for so many other extremely important aspects in our children’s lives! 

So, yes, I’m that mom. I encourage school spirit and strive to create a positive experience for my children in every aspects of their lives, especially their education. I know it’s important, but it’s a lot of fun too!

Want to try something amazing?!

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Time to Talk

I am a mother to three beautiful babies. I am a wife to the most amazing man on earth. I’m growing my bakery slowly but surely. My blog continues to grow daily. I’ve been told I have a smile that lights up a room. I’ve been also told that I am a motivator. 

Majority of my life I have been this happy and joyful woman, always wore a smile, and strove hard to make others happy as well. Recently, it feels as if I woke up one day feeling completely overwhelmed, panicked, stressed, depressed… I feel as if no matter how blessed I am, how beautiful my life is, I can’t fight back these tears or bits of anger. 

About two months after giving birth to my beautiful baby boy, I was diagnosed with post partum depression and post partum anxiety. Something I never imagined I would face to battle. Like I said, I’ve always been so happy and cheerful. And now holding my baby boy… This should be the happiest moments of my life with my beautiful babies, I should be enjoying every second, but I’m drowning in this funk, covered by this dark cloud that won’t go away. 

My doctor wants to put me on medication to help with both, but emphasized how the medication could diminish my milk supply, as well as make my (currently controlled) heart condition worse. The negative side effects scared me just as much as the constant battle of emotions terrify me. But after a lot of consideration and talk with both my OBGYN and Cardio doctors, I’m trying to tackle this without medication. 

It’s a tough battle to say the least. I prefer to say “battle” over “suffer” cause everytime depression or anxiety hits, I will hit back twice as hard! For now, instead of going day by day, I’m going moment by moment. I am working hard on figuring out what works and what doesn’t. This last month I have spent reflecting on what triggers my anxiety and depression. How to put myself first so I can take care of everyone else. How to see a situation differently and teaching myself to react differently. 

I know now it’s perfectly okay to admit I’m not okay and that I need help. I’ve always been so stubborn and never wanted to burden others with my problems. But battling PPDA I’m learning that I need help from others as well as myself to get thru this. I want to be the best mother and wife I can possibly be. I will fight hard to get thru this and not let it consume me. 

I’m hoping sharing my story with everyone as I go thru this will help others, but also help myself. Getting what I’m feeling deep down out onto “paper” helps me tremendously!! So hold on tight…. cause it’s going to be a bumpy road to happiness and becoming a stronger better version of myself. 

New Years Eve…Eve lol

So 2017 is right around the corner. It feels like this year has just zipped by! I blinked and it’s almost over. So many amazing things have happened to our family, so much to be grateful for, a few things I hope to leave behind, and excited for the new year. 

My parents, I’d say, are traditionally old school. They believe in old wives tales and superstitions. Raised me the same way. Hey! What does it hurt to make sure all your money is faced the same way? It may or may not bring abundance of fortune to my household, but I still do it!

New Years Eve in our house has always been full of superstitions I thought were so silly, until I had my own family. I look back at my parents lives. They’ve always had more than they needed, lived in great health, and always happy. So yes, I continue them in our family. And we’ve always have what we need and then some, great health, and always happy. 

Today, I want to share with you those superstitions that we do for New Years Eve and New Years Day!

  1. First and foremost, eating black eyed peas on New Years Eve. You can make them any which way your heart desires! My mom always boiled them in hamhocks, I make a Cowboy Caviar. A bite of black eyed peas brings good luck for the new year!
  2. Eating greens brings prosperity. My mom would always alternate what greens we ate. In our house, we make a salad with spinach or romaine lettuce. 
  3. Kissing someone at midnight. Well, why wouldn’t you kiss someone you love? The meaning behind this is to bring affection to your love life in every month of the upcoming year. Who doesn’t want more affection?! 🙋🏻 Love you boo! 
  4. Eat 12 grapes at midnight. One for each month of the year. This brings more good luck for each month. 
  5. No bare cupboards when midnight strikes! Otherwise they’ll be bare all year long. No body wants that!
  6. Open all your doors and cupboards minutes before midnight. This one my husband’s good friend shared with us. By opening the doors and cupboards, it lets all the bad out from the previous year. 
  7. Make lots of noise! This ones my favorite! I remember as a kid being at my parent’s cabin, banging on pots and pans on the patio and my dad shooting off his gun! It was so much fun! Lol Some blow whistles, noise makers, and much more! The meaning behind this is to keep the evil spirits from entering your life in the coming year.
  8. Nothing goes out on the first day of the New Year. Trash can wait. Need to deliver presents or take a work bag with you? Load it in the car the night before. Taking things out New Years Day will mean you’ll be loosing things all year long. 
  9. This one I’m totally okay with! Don’t clean New Years Day! The superstition claims you’re cleaning away the good fortune for the up coming year. So the laundry, dishes, and chores can wait!!
  10. Eat pork New Years Eve and New Years Day! Pigs root forward when they eat, and we all want to move forward! Also, it’s rich fat content symbolizes wealth and prosperity. Avoid chicken because they peck at the ground and move backwards to eat meaning you’ll be living in the past. Avoid beef because they stay in the same spot while they eat meaning you’ll not move forward. 

There you have it! The superstitions our family do on New Years Eve and Mew Years Day! I would love to hear some of your you do as well!! 

The New Year means new beginnings, fresh starts, reaffirming love and promises for a brighter future. A new year is like a blank book, and the pen is in your hands. It is your chance to write a beautiful story for yourself. Wishing you alll a very happy and blessed New Year. I cannot wait to see what’s in store!